I was bored, angry, tired and sad. I felt all alone yet I had nothing to complain about. I had a good job, a husband who as far as I could tell wasn't shagging his assistant, three children who apart from being the occasional assholes were pretty good kids; a house, a dog and everything else we are told as little girls we should aspire to. But inside, I was growing restless. I was sick of having the same dull conversations about meal plans and kid-friendly holidays. I was frustrated with having the same married sex I'd been having for the past seven years, or not having any sex at all. I didn't want to be looked at as just a 'mom'. I wanted to be desired, to make someone's hair stand on end and go crazy for me. I didn't want to live by some label that didn't represent me. I looked at my messy SUV after my yoga class one morning and I wanted to vomit on it all. I panicked, thinking about how I am slowly approaching middle age and the menopause and I wondered how many years do I have left of being 'f**ckable' before everything starts going downhill? F*cked at 40 is a funny, raw and empowering mid-life crisis. Tova Leigh takes the reader along on her journey of rediscovering her identity after motherhood, encouraging women to break free from society's expectations. This paperback edition includes a hilarious new chapter on Tova's life in lockdown, revealing how vibrators didn't just add a zing but also provided an income that kept food on the table