Sex is one of the most beautiful ways to express love in a relationship. It can also be a fun creative way to express who you are, in a safe controlled atmosphere. In my experience, nothing makes sex better than an open, honest, and clear communication with your partner. At times you may want to explore your sexual fantasies, introduce a bit of kink into your life, or begin to live the lifestyle with a select partner or partners.

Exploring your sexuality is not always an easy conversation. I have learned is that it is not easy to start these conversations. Sometimes the unknown reaction as to how your partner may react when you say you want to try something new to make sex exciting can be daunting.

Over the years I’ve discovered a number of tools to make this introduction easier, and to make what you do enjoy a regular part of your life in a safe and sane manner. A Want-Will-Won’t chart was created years ago and made available in different forms on the Internet. I have created a similar chart to explore your own sexuality and the sexuality of your partners, added a second chart to specifically explore your limits in BDSM play, and finally I have added a formal contract for your relationship.

This is an opportunity for conversation to get wild and explore erotic fantasies and cravings.

For play couples who agree on trying new things, this can be a precarious time. Going too far, too fast or even a small misconception can end up being hurtful to you or your lover. It is very important to set the clear and concise boundaries of what erotic activities you really want to explore and what are the No GO areas.